I always look forward to creating a piece for the Midland Area Cultural Awareness Coalition‘s annual Creativity Contest, displayed at one of the galleries teach through, Creative 360. The theme always provides a thought provoking prompt to inspire a piece I may not have come up with otherwise, and this year was no different: Our shared humanity unites us all. In the background of my piece are the words ‘All humans are resilient. All humans are valuable. All humans have a story. All humans are fascinating. All humans are worthy of love’. I chose to depict a scene of joyful female community, titled Sacred.

Growing up, without expounding into detail I was definitely one of those girls that struggled with female friendships. I found a few close friends that I am still close with today, but overall I just felt like I didn’t understand how to fit in at the girls’ table. My roommates in college ended up being a prevalent topic in therapy. Even when I started seriously dating as a young adult and I’d go to couples gatherings with my partner’s friend group, when eventually the bonfire was lit, the sun was setting, and the group started separating into gendered clusters I always hung out with all the boyfriends! This likely did not make me any more popular.

One of my favorite things about getting older, at least in my corner of the world, is the fact that at almost 40 it seems like all those picky little differences that we thought meant we couldn’t enjoy each other’s company when we were younger just don’t matter anymore. I’m unmarried and childfree by choice, and your major life goal is to get married and raise a family? Cool, when are we hanging out next? You enjoy the nightlife 7 days a week and I’m in my PJs by 11 with a book, awesome – let’s grab dinner and catch some live music. I have multiple good friends that are over 70. I have friends that are active in the alternative scene, and friends that read Amish romance novels. I have friends all over the spectrum as far as upbringing, spiritual beliefs, even friends whose parents were born in a different country. Growing up, I felt like relationships were so rigid, and I think they were more so to an extent. However, I also think I mentally built fences without meaning to. I assumed there was no point in building a relationship with certain people because once they got to know me they’d see how different I was from them and not like me anyway. What a waste these assumptions were. Learning rather than fear or defensiveness is such a feeling of freedom.

Dropping a song below from a magnificent band I was lucky enough to see live over the summer that seems at least loosely related.